Bullying
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Information on Bullying
- Bullying has a long-lasting negative impact on those who are bullied
- Video #1 on the Impact of Bullying
- Video #2 on the Impact of Bullying
- The majority of kids do not like bullying (90%) and being a bully actually makes most kids view that person in a worse light because:
- Most of us have had something said or done to us that have stuck with us in a negative way, and we know what that feels like.
- Still, many kids continue to bully others with recent research finding some of the reasons:
- Due to their own loss of power or control (e.g. Issues at home that they can't control, or were bullied themselves!)
- Ironically, to try to maintain, or improve their own social standing
- 85% of Schoolyard Bullying is done with an audience.
- Also, recent statistics show that peer intervention is the most effective method of reducing bullying.
- Peers intervening in bullying reduced bullying in one school by 50% compared to adults intervening, which only reduced it by 30%
- 57% of the time Bullying stops within 10sec when someone intervenes on behalf of the victim - (Craig & Pepler, 1997)
- Thus, it is the bystanders who have the most power!
- Many bystanders react differently for different reasons, and unfortunately many of those reactions encourage bullying:
- Observers: These bystanders do nothing for fear of being chosen next, or losing friends/status.
- Observers passively encourage bullying because many want the audience
- Supporters: These bystanders join in, or support the bully.
- Many supporters can't articulate why they join in with the bullying; but, being part of the crowd can encourage bully's further
- Defenders: These bystanders try to help the one being bullied, and are our goal!
- Observers: These bystanders do nothing for fear of being chosen next, or losing friends/status.
- Ways to Help:
- Information on what kids can do to help stop bullying.
- Walk Away from a bullying situation and not give the bully an audience.
- Then, tell a trusted adult what is happening
- Think about your feelings - Empathy for both the bully and bullied:
- Why might the bully be doing this? How can you help them to stop and deal with their feelings?
- Understand how the one being bullied must feel
- Many of us have had bad experiences, or been bullied, and we can draw upon those to understand the target's feelings
- Be kind to the person who was bullied:
- Say or do something nice for them (even if it is at a later time - don't let them feel alone)
- If you feel safe doing so, try to draw the target away by saying they are needed somewhere, or they were supposed to be playing a game somewhere else...
- Try to direct the bully's attention to other activities (Let's go do ...) or stick up for the bullied kid in a non-direct way
- Here John Greene talks about him being bullied and the weird thing that helped.
- Bystander Revolution has many videos from celebrities about their experiences and how to try to help stop bullying
- Don't engage in Gossip but instead change the subject, or try to promote good things about the target
- Source of much of this information: http://www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk/media/1050/bystanders_and_bullying.pdf
- Bullying Help Line
- Erase Bullying Website
Electronic / Cyber Bullying:
- Social media itself can increase feelings of loneliness and depression and be a platform for cyber bullying.
- The reasons and impacts of cyber bullying are very similar to those for "in-person" bullying.
- However, cyber bullying is often away from adults making it less likely to be reported.
- Still, reporting cyber bullying and, as a bystander, trying to help the bullied person (or bully - they are more likely to be acting out due to tough circumstances in their life) are still the most helpful and important things you can do.
- Embarrassment and fear are two of the strongest tools for any person wishing to do harm (Don't internalize - Talk!).
- Cyberbullying Information and resources for teens
- Cyberbullying Information and resources for parents